Bullfights and Forks

 According to Dr. Susan Weinschenk's The Brain Lady Newsletter, at the latest Consumer Electronics show there was recently introduced a device called the HAPI fork (pronounced 'happy'). This fork vibrates when you eat too fast and has an app that keeps track of your eating habits, allowing you to become aware of what you are doing so you can then modify your behavior accordingly.

Excuse me! Truth is I can see how it could be a behavior modification tool, but, really, my first response to this 'fork' was more of the 'you've got to be kidding' variety. Are we so dysfunctional that we need to make an electronic fork that tells us how fast or slow to eat? Does anyone else think there's something wrong with this picture?

Life is changing so rapidly and not necessarily for the better. Part of me just wants to go hide out in the backwoods somewhere and get back to a life of simplicity. Or at least move in that direction. Simplify! Simplify! Simplify! That is my heart's cry. I want out of the rat race. I don't like where it seems to be heading and I don't know what, if anything, I can do about it. Which for me brings me back to the question of what's the purpose and meaning in life? Specifically, what's my purpose and meaning in life?

There are those who would have you believe that there is no purpose or meaning to life, that we just happened to evolve out of nothingness. Sorry, but I don't have enough faith to believe something that seems so preposterous. Life and the universe cannot possibly be a result of random chance. That's actually the easiest part to figure out about all of this. After that things seem to get extremely complicated, or should I say complex. It's all about one's chosen point of view.

If life is viewed as an unsolvable series of complications, it's easy to slip into a victim mentality. Been there, done that as the saying goes. This point of view tends to keep you mired in apathy and disappointment, or, it makes you like a bull in a bull fight, constantly getting ran through with swords until the pain drives you crazy, raging mad and you try to kill everything in sight. Not a pleasant place to be. Nor productive, for yourself or others.

But, if life is viewed as a thing of beautiful complexity, it's possible to see the wonder and feel the excitement of discovery, down which path there is enthusiasm, passion, and a zest for living that keeps you focused and moving forward, growing. Somewhere along that path you learn to let go of the concept of purpose except as it is defined by "being". "I AM" God told Moses. It is difficult for us mere mortals to "be", to understand that 'being' IS the purpose.

I wonder if Adam and Eve worried about their purpose? Somehow I doubt that.

Asking the Right Questions

I truly believe that one of the most important keys in life is learning to ask the right questions. When I run across one of those 'questions' somewhere, they are like a solid brick wall stopping me abruptly in my path. I had one of those experiences today on Facebook.

A picture posted by Sketches in Stillness posed the following question:

Do you consider yourself a problem to be fixed...Or can you allow yourself to be exactly as you are right now, in peace, without believing in your stressful thoughts?

This was one of those "seeing what you really believe about yourself" moments for me. I realized that is exactly how I see myself and this belief directs a large portion of my life.

So then, the question for me becomes where's the balance between recognizing that you need improvement in some area and pursuing that purposefully and diligently, and, pushing yourself to change to the point that the stress you cause yourself becomes harmful to you physically, mentally, and emotionally?

And how does that affect what you believe others think of you or how they 'see' you, thereby causing you to act in ways that may not be good for you or anyone else? In other words, if anyone sees theirself as broken and needing to be fixed, they usually automatically assume that others see them the same way. We tend to think that others think the same way we do, although experience often proves that assumption to be false. That's just one of those traits that all of humanity shares.

How far do I believe that I differ from 'normal' or 'average'? And where am I getting my definition of those terms?

Most of us don't really know what we believe deep down inside and would be hard-pressed to define those beliefs if we had to. More often than not, our actions don't line up with what we say we believe, for if they did, we wouldn't struggle so within ourselves. It wouldn't be so hard to change habits, most of which we don't even recognize as habits in the first place. Usually we just think 'that's the way I've always done it,' or 'that's the way I was taught', or that's how my parents did it.' Or we fool ourselves into thinking we do things the way we do because that's just what we want to do.

It's too much work, and often too fearful or painful, to face the person within. We're afraid we won't like the person within, and most times that really is the truth. Truly not liking yourself, or hating yourself, is the ultimate rejection, a very scary place to be.

I have knowingly been close enough to that place to know I don't want to go there again, which brings me back to the original question of whether I see myself as a problem to be fixed. Maybe the emotional impact of that experience is what has made that question so real to me. And that is not necessarily a negative thing.

Obviously, the answers to these questions will be unique for each person as we are all individuals with different experiences, etc. But I wonder how many others are so affected by this question? I'm sure I'll never know but that doesn't stop me from wondering. It's the philosophical part of my nature I think.

What is a question that has truly impacted your life? I would love to hear from you.